kettchmeifyoucan | Mission 5: We Are Go for Ewoks

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Mission 5: We Are Go for Ewoks

[Action: Morning, Mayfield Used Car Lot]

[Wes has decided to liven up his job today in his usual way. The town really shouldn't have given him back Lieutenant Kettch back if they didn't want this happening.

Anyone wandering through the lot will find a life sized toy Ewok hiding in a car.]

[Action, Afternoon, Park]

[Wes really was just walking home. But he can't resist the temptation to pop Kettch out from behind a tree.]

Yub yub!

[Action, Evening, Shooting Range]

[Wes has set Kettch in a corner while he practices with his blaster. He's just about to take a break]

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[ Garviel's reaction is as unsurprising as it is swift. ]
XENOS!

[ he drives a ham-sized fist at Lt. Kettch. ]

[Wes jumps back at that. He, at least, is surprised]

Xen-what?

I swear to god, if you are a pokemon--

[And now Wes is just confused]

Never even heard of one.

...Oh. Good.

Do I even want to know?

[La la la, it's a nice day for a bike ri-JESUS FUCK EWOK WHAT]

GAH!

[Brakes squeal, tires skid and Hal knocks the wind out of himself with his handlebars. Give him a moment.]

...hhhhhhngh...

[Hey, Wes! Guess who's back at work, and with both arms now? That one-armed drone was really strange, acting like he'd lost the arm in the war.

Before he can wave to his co-worker, though, he spots something in one of the cars.]

Hey!

Hey, you! Get out of there!

[He raps on the window.]

[Now there's a sight for sore eyes. Those sanitized war stories were getting dull.]

Don't mind Kettch, just seeing if the drones will actually react.

[Wes follows the Ewok out from behind the tree]

Uh, sorry about that, didn't mean to send you careening off.

.....

You were playing a trick?

Bit of a tradition back home.

[There hasn't been much activity around the used car lot save a few drones passing by. Fassad isn't even certain why he bothers showing up for work when he could stay at home and away from people. He's walking around with a clipboard in one hand, pretending to take inventory, and scarfing down a banana held in his other hand. Once finishing, Fassad throws the peel behind him.

Oh, what do you know. It looks as if there's actually a customer for a change. Fassad sees somebody inside a car just ahead of him. Clearing his throat and making as genuine of a smile that he could muster, the man walks over to the car and taps its window.]

Hello, sir, hello!

Did you have any luck finding happiness through that car? That's my job, to help you find the car that would make you the happiest.

[Heinz was off to look into getting himself a vehicle. Being able to drive places would be useful! And also, he could remodel the thing. Soon, very soon.

So there he was, wandering through the lot, kicking tires and checking mirrors...

AND THEN THERE IS A FUZZY THING IN THE CAR.

He screams, flails his arms, and leaps onto the hood of the unoccupied car next to it.]

I would like an explanation.

His name is Lieutenant Kettch and he's an Ewok. Wound up being a mascot of sort for the squad.

[He waves him off, sucking in air.]

'sfine...just...gimme a minute...

Hey, Wes. [Wiping his upper lip with the back of his hand, Hal straightens.]

When did you get the...Ewok?

Town delivered him after one of those... interesting periods. Hal Jordan, meet Lieutenant Kettch.

Uh, you all right?

Kettch really prefers things that fly.

Nwe... hehehe... [Is this person a customer? Well, either way, he can't blow his act now. Putting his hands together, the mustached man gives a friendly grin.]

Ah, sir, sir, but Kettch will feel as if he really is flying... when he really isn't, but that is the magic behind this car.

I can guarantee that he will be very happy with his purchase... for a very low cost, which always makes people happier.

[Have a little half-salute that still manages to look executed well, Lt Kettch. Once in the service, always in the service. Hal peers closer and then glances at his fellow pilot.]

...it isn't real, is it?

No, no, they're sentient beings. He's a toy. He did actually fly on a mission once though.

That's one Hell of a good luck charm, Wes. [Lt Kettch gets a little poke and a squeeze.]

George Lucas couldn't have done it better.

He started a joke, but he was basically the squadron mascot after a while. I don't think Wedge ever quite got over having to fly with Kettch in his lap that time though.

[Which of course had nothing to do with him not letting him forget it, of course]

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Mission 5: We Are Go for Ewoks

[Action, Afternoon, Park]

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Action; Park

[Action: Morning]

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Action: Used Car Lot

[Action: Morning, Mayfield Used Car Lot]

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